Latest Jokes in English


List of English Jokes:


Santa cuts sides of the capsule

before taking it ?

Guess why ?

To avoid the side effects !!!

A typical student flips a coin and thinks :

Head will go to sleep ,

Tail will watch a movie ,

Stands will listen to music,

Stays in air will study !!!๐Ÿ˜œ๐Ÿ˜†๐Ÿ˜‚

After our last argument,

I told my Girlfriend :

I hope your next Boyfriend

Appreciates the improvements

I've made in you ....๐Ÿ˜œ๐Ÿ˜†๐Ÿ˜‚

Boy : You are sunshine of my life

Without you life is cloudy ..

You are in my heart like rainy water

for barren land !!!

Girl : Darling ! Is it proposal

or Weather report ?๐Ÿ˜œ๐Ÿ˜†๐Ÿ˜‚

Wife is dreaming in the middle of the

night and suddenly shouts :

Up!! Quick! My husband is back !!

Man gets up , jumps out of the window,

hurts himself , and then realize :

Damn , I am the husband !!๐Ÿ˜œ๐Ÿ˜†๐Ÿ˜‚

Santa was standing below a tube 

light with mouth wide open....

Why ??

Because his doctor advised him

" Today's dinner should be light "๐Ÿ˜œ๐Ÿ˜†๐Ÿ˜‚

The teacher asked all the students 

in a class to write an essay on a

cricket match ......

All were busy writing expect Banta...

He Wrote " DUE TO RAIN , NO MATCH "๐Ÿ˜œ๐Ÿ˜†๐Ÿ˜‚

Photographer Santa was focusing on the 

dead body's face in a funeral function ...

Suddenly all the relatives started beating 

him ..... Why ??

Because He said " SMILE PLEASE"๐Ÿ˜œ๐Ÿ˜†๐Ÿ˜‚

Teacher : Tomorrow there will be a lecture 

on Sun , Everyone must attend it 

Raju : No! I will not be a able to attend it ....

Teacher : Why ??

Raju : My mother will not allow me to 

go so far !!!๐Ÿ˜œ๐Ÿ˜†๐Ÿ˜‚

Son : Dad , what is an idiot ?

Dad : An idiot is a person who tries to 

explain his ideas in such a strange 

and long way that another person 

who is listening to him can't 

understand him. Do you 

understand me ?

Son : No!!๐Ÿ˜œ๐Ÿ˜†๐Ÿ˜‚

Patient : Doctor , I have a pain in 

my eye whenever i drink tea .

Doctor : Take the spoon out of 

the mug before you drink .๐Ÿ˜œ๐Ÿ˜†๐Ÿ˜‚

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